A place to record all of the above.
A place to record all of the above.
One thing I am deeply aware of right now is that no one wants to be taught unless they are specifically seeking a teaching. If they are going to someone for advice, counseling, teaching, etc., then they of course are reaching out for the teaching. Otherwise, everyone just wants to be accepted for who they are. In the moment. No matter how they show up. This has been constantly in my face since the spring.
I admit, I have been the one that is quick to throw the suggestions and teachings out there to others. Dare I say it is my nature because I love to teach. That's not what people want. You see, I have experienced ( and am currently experiencing) both sides of this coin, with the second side being the most dominant right now. What I can tell you is that being taught at fucking sucks.
In my experiences, I just want to be "be'd" with. Yep...I just created my own word. I am a very open person.
I am not afraid to share what is going on with me. It is very obvious that others take that as an open invitation to school me on how I should show up. W.....T....F....Of course the little girl in me says...oh gee...I guess I'm not good enough for them. That is an old pattern that is being repatterned with in me. One person actually came out last week and said I wasn't good enough. WOW. Just WOW. I get that it's where they are coming from, that they aren't accepting of themselves, yada, yada. It still takes me aback. More like I retreat from contact with them. I mean, how dare they not meet me where I would like to be met?
Well guess what?!?! No one can. Only we can give ourselves the love and support that we need, want and desire. Only we can love ourselves so deeply that it doesn't matter what anyone says or does. With all of that lovin', I am also acutely aware of the boundaries that need to be set. Boundaries need to be set because the love you have for yourself is so immense that the thought of someone stepping over them is appalling. Finding our voices for something when we feel like we are being overshadowed. It's one of the biggest cruxes of the life of the Empath isn't it?!?!?! Setting the boundaries. We learned somewhere in our lives to put others needs and feelings ahead of our own so that we could feel apart and appreciated.
We allowed our boundaries to be stomped on or even erased so that we could get others to accept us and love us. We make sure every one else feels OK and safe, so that we can feel OK and safe. Yet, when it comes down to it, we don't feel safe and alright. It's quite the opposite. We recognized a long time ago that we get ostracized for sharing our feelings and or expressing our true essence, so we make sure that everyone else feels safe and their needs are met.
Pish posh. It's time we take a stand for ourselves. It's time we tell ourselves that we are safe to feel anything that we are feeling and it is safe to express ourselves, in our entirety. If you can, recognize the signs when you are taking the back burner and not upholding your boundaries. (If you have recognized your boundaries...or maybe that's where you can start, recognizing your boundaries) Remember dear empaths, it's not to beat yourself up for any of this....you are only doing the best you can...
Which, coming back full circle to those that feel they want to teach us when we haven't asked, is all any of us are doing--the best we can in every moment. Please remember this....and remember, I am sharing with you all of this because of my own experiences. I hardly do the unwanted teaching any longer. If I do, I catch myself because I know what it feels like to be on the receiving end. I share this today for my eyes and I share in hopes that it will help any of you also. Keep on keepin' on and keep being amazing!
Until next time...
This is where I put the things that the Divine wants me to share at this time. :-)
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